8/19/14: Bachelor in Paradise - ep 3

Thank goodness this show is only a few weeks long, I don't know how much more I can take.  Elise is full-on bats**t crazy, and should volunteer for research studies on relationships, mental health, emotional health, and delusional tendencies.  I think she'd be a great candidate!  Does "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" exist in real life?  She may be the first documented case with her amazing ability to amnesia herself out of the Dylan slump and bounce back so quickly with Chris.

I was taking my puppy for a walk so missed the first 10 minutes of last night's episode, which I'd naively assumed would be busy recapping last week -- I was wrong.  We were introduced to a new cast mate during that time!  Who remembers Danielle from Juan Pablo's season?

???

Yeah, I didn't either.  Her hair is now blond and in desperate need of a VO5 treatment -- humidity is not her friend.

Her and Marquel went on a date, Elise and Chris went on a date, AshLee and Graham went on a date, and then Jackie from Sean's season showed up and snatched Marquel out of Danielle's grips for a date.

Happy to report that Chris injured himself, he embarrassed himself with some really inappropriate innuendos and suggestions, and Elise was too busy planning their wedding and future babies' names to care that she was portrayed as a hussy on tv.  Just as well,  after 2 dates they rode off into the sunset together and left paradise so Chris could heal in Chicago under Elise's careful watch.  She thinks she's Florence Nightingale, when really she's just eye candy for the wounded warrior.

Rose ceremony: Danielle goes home and flaps her hair over her face in the Reject RV (mature, healthy reaction), and as mentioned Chris and Elise Bukowski peace out.  Michelle Money (who I'm thoroughly tired of looking at) bawls her eyes out again when Chris saves her from impending doom and getting booted out of the house -- apparently since he didn't need to give his rose to Elise he felt the need to keep M&M around.  WHY??!!!  I was happy when it looked like she was going to leave ... don't dangle the dream and then snatch it away!

Next week we have a 2 parter on Monday/Tuesday -- there's an ambulance, some chick runs away to the jungle, AshLee raises the insanity bar again, and someone ends up bleeding.  All I gotta say is there better be buckets of blood around and not just some paper cut we're overly dramatic about.  Something needs to liven this up!

To stave off the frustration at how bored I am after this week, here's a montage of my ridiculously adorable dog:

Ah, I feel better :)

So cute, I can't stand it!  No wonder he can get away with murder ;)  And yes, that is the same dog in all 3 pictures - the headshot is right after he got his hair cut and the others are more recent.  His hair gets shaggy and curly as it grows, and man alive he's cute both ways!

See you next week!