It's been awhile and it feels good to be back with you!
Britt looks like she's the Disney princess caricature of a regular human like Buzzfeed did to their staffers here. The big, dopey eyes and saccharine sweet persona are too much. Glad to see she ditched the glittery make-up for tonight, but Kaitlyn looks amazing. Beautiful navy dress, soft curls - stunning.
I didn't pregame going into this season so have no idea what these guys have to offer outside of what's shown on TV - from episode 1 last night there are a few goobers already in the mix:
Jared (L) is like a knock-off version of Brooks (R) from Des' season:
vs 
Brady has an on-again-off-again British accent, and looks like the result if you added Mackelmore & Larry Sr from "The Long Island Medium" together:
=
Tony talks to bonsai trees and was sporting a shiner (what up, bro? A little fisticuffs, maybe?)
Kupah wants a trophy wife; and in my head I pronounced his name like chutzpah (which would have been a million times better!)
Josh is a law student by day, stripper by night (and not a very good one at that ... eek!)
And Brad looked like he just wanted to get physical* (*10 points to whoever guesses correctly what I am referring to!):
The douche of the night was Ryan M. - he got plastered and came off like a total a-hole. He wanted to take one of the girls out for a steak dinner and never call her again, heckled one of the other contestants before he even got to talk to the ladies, touched Kaitlyn's butt uninvited, and told a joke about rape. That's an oxy-moron but you know what I mean. Thankfully our fearless leader Chris Harrison called him out and kicked him off.
The men got to vote for which woman they would rather keep around. Awkward for all, and I just kept hoping they'd keep Kaitlyn and send Britt packing. What was fun about it though were the "Operation" type ballot boxes:
Yes, someone was commissioned to carve the outline of a rose into two wooden boxes specifically for this occasion. That's kind of sad - but kudos to the production team for their commitment to this one night of the season.
I was sooo hoping that each box would buzz a loud "ehhh!!!" when Chris H took them out to count. I didn't hear any in the background, maybe it's a feature they can add for next season.
At any rate, here is the vote:
We still had a rose ceremony tonight, so we'll bid adieu to these guys:
Brady/Mackelmore sent himself home because he loved Britt too much to stay without her; Joe our Magic Mike reject; Brad and his sweatband; and the only Canadian in the pack. I didn't catch his name, but he looked like a ginger-haired version of Louie Anderson. Look at the bios, you'll be able to find him pretty easily.
I leave you with one of the best representations of 80's music and workout fashion: "Let's get physical, physical...!" You're welcome!
See you next week :)
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