Finally, resolution to last week! We join Team Bachelor back at the corn palace. Oh, didn’t I mention last week that the
producers somehow found a hotel in NM that just happened to have artsy corn on
the walls?! No, oh my bad. Feast your eyes:
 |
| Mmmm, maize-y. |
(See that language skill? Thanks. #blessedwitheloquence – see below for
explanation)
Just another subtle reminder that our
bachelor is a farmer. Lest we forget
midway through the season, you know.
We’re back to laying on the floor with
Kelsey:
She starts talking about brownies, takes a
hit from the oxygen mask, and she’s bouncing back up with a hug from
Chris! Fake? Yes. Manipulative? Yes. Amazing? YES!!!
The rest of the chicks are livid, but there’s no time for tears as we
head to the rose ceremony (FINALLY).
What was great is that Kelsey took advantage of awards season and accepted
one for her brilliant performance on the floor:
Kelsey for her role in Bachelor Mansion Meltdown 2015!!!
No, really, Kelsey got another rose and that meant we bid a fond farewell to Mackenzie (who can now return to the
mother ship of her alien culture) and Samantha. Who, you ask?
Well, she’s tall-ish, has brown hair, and … um…that’s about it. Her pre-farewell camera time is the most I’ve
heard her talk all season. Pretty sure
everyone else there thought she was part of the production team and didn’t
realize she was still a contestant. Hard
to be sad to see someone go when you didn’t know they were there in the first
place.
Moving on, we leave New Mexico and head to
SOUTH DAKOTA! Seriously. Where’s my trip to Bora Bora? This is a tour of the most random collection
of destinations. Ok, SD it is so let’s
get to it. We have a 1:1 with Becca
where they ride some horses and shoot some guns. I seriously have no idea what else happened
because the sh*t was going down at the house.
It was a gang-up on Kelsey that was a long time coming. They unleashed their claws and accusations,
and she cried. Big, fake crocodile
tears. But she did throw down this gem
to explain why she’s so misunderstood:
Apparently having a command of the English
language makes you come off as phony. If
that’s the case I better dumb myself down before someone gets the wrong
impression of me!
Time for the group date! We had our first celebrity musicians with a
visit from Big & Rich! Thank
goodness the show played the one song that hit mainstream so I knew who these
cowpokes were – “Save A Horse, Ride A Cowboy” is their claim to fame. I won’t even touch that one, it’s too easy J The Big fella and the Rich fella
asked the girls to pen some lyrics for our farmer. It was the dying cat parade overall, with the
ladies & Chris hitting notes I never thought possible. Britt
and Chris were having a pretty epic day in spite of the rest of the ladies
being on their date, and to cap it off Chris whisked Britt away to the B&R
concert playing down the street. That
left the rest of the ladies sitting around for over an hour waiting.
For real, and she got the rose to boot! For what it’s worth, Tears For Fears would
have been an appropriately ironic guest as both of those emotions were on
display by the end of the day.
Ok, time for the main event: the dreaded 2
on 1 date !!! In one corner coming in at
5’4” full of crazy is Kelsey! (*boo!*)
In the other corner caked with make-up is KardAshley!
(*woo!*)
This is the most uncomfortable helicopter
ride ever.
How many different ways can each person
look to avoid the other humans in that small space?
Sabotage was the name of the game with KardAshley
throwing Kelsey under the bus for being the most hated woman in the house. Kelsey threw dirt back when Chris told her
what Ashley said; and while the showdown between the women wasn’t that great
the meltdowns and subsequent marching orders were. Chris sent both women home in one fell
swoop!!
While they were shocked at KardAshley’s
exit, they were nothing short of elated that Kelsey got sent home. Here is the celebration heard round the twittersphere:
We missed another
rose ceremony tonight but I think the other departures made up for it. To reward our patience ABC is treating us to
Happy Hour: Bachelor 2-for-1 starting Sunday night! Get your margarita’s ready, this is gonna be
good!
No comments:
Post a Comment